oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
where are you?
Hypothermia
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
