Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
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