So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
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