Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
