I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
are you so shy because you have an std?
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Randomize