Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
