i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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