if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
