Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Oh god it's open bar.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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