Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
my phone needs a breathalizer
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
