Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize