Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
