I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
