I can text with my tongue
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Randomize
