Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize