In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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