I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
