Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
