My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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