I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
