you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
