I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
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