I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize