go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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