omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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