:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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