Please, let me fuck your mom
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Randomize
