Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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