It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
