Need sex. Gaining weight.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
