happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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