I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
