just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
