i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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