OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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