so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
