You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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