so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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