Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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