There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Randomize
