Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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