Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
In America we eat man semen.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
i think i just naturally attract stoners
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
