I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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