i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
ok first of all what the fuck
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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