White coat. Heels.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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