I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Randomize
