he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
