I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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