You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
This girl is more easily done than said...
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Terrible idea I love it
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
