Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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