The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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