My boss' voice literally gives me gas
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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